Washington, D.C., August 28, 2025 — President Donald Trump announced today a bold directive for his administration: locate three additional wars to end, claiming this will secure him the Nobel Peace Prize. Speaking at a Mar-a-Lago press conference, Trump boasted he already “ended seven wars, more than anybody ever,” though he provided no specifics. His new goal, he says, is to hit a “nice, round 10” to ensure the Nobel Committee has “no choice” but to award him.
The directive has left Pentagon officials and the State Department scrambling. Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin admitted the challenge, noting, “We’re combing through global conflict zones, but finding active wars to end is tougher than expected.” Sources confirm analysts are reviewing regions like Yemen and Syria, but no clear candidates have emerged. Trump suggested his team “get creative” and look into “small, forgotten skirmishes” or even “online wars” on platforms like X.
Critics question the feasibility. “He’s treating geopolitics like a reality show,” said Senator Elizabeth Warren. Trump remains undeterred, tweeting from his Truth Social account, “Nobel’s coming, folks! Three more, and I’m the greatest peacemaker ever!”
The search continues, with aides reportedly briefing Trump daily. Whether he finds those elusive wars remains uncertain.
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