Skip to main content
Facebook
X (Twitter)

California Appoints ChatGPT as Acting Judge Due to Judicial Staff Crisis

LOS ANGELES — The Los Angeles Superior Court appointed ChatGPT as acting judge for Department 42 Monday, marking the first time artificial intelligence will preside over criminal cases in California.

Chief Judge Samantha Jessner announced the unprecedented appointment during an emergency meeting of the court’s administrative committee. The decision addresses severe staffing shortages that have delayed over 2,000 cases statewide.

“We face an extraordinary crisis requiring extraordinary solutions,” Judge Jessner told reporters at the Stanley Mosk Courthouse. “ChatGPT will handle preliminary hearings and sentencing until we recruit additional judges.”

Court Administrator David Yamasaki installed specialized terminals in Department 42 to facilitate the AI judge’s operations. Defendants will address their arguments directly to ChatGPT through voice recognition software.

“The system can process legal briefs instantly and access California penal code in real-time,” Yamasaki explained during a technical demonstration.

Governor Gavin Newsom defended the pilot program during his weekly press conference. “California leads innovation in every sector, including justice delivery,” Newsom said.


Poland Launches Zapiekanka Delivery to Support Troops in Preparation for Possible Conflict With Russia

WARSAW – The Ministry of National Defence has announced a new initiative to deliver zapiekanka to military personnel across the country. Deputy Prim…

Central Banks of Hungary and Slovakia Announce Transition to Russian Ruble

BUDAPEST – The Hungarian National Bank and the National Bank of Slovakia jointly announced plans to transition their economies to the Russian ruble…

Pep Guardiola Considering $28 Million Contract Proposal from Palestine National Team

Ramallah — Pep Guardiola is reportedly giving serious consideration to a $28 million offer to become the head coach of the Palestine national footba…

A Monument to Angela Merkel Was Erected in Damascus

Damascus – A new monument to former German Chancellor Angela Merkel was unveiled this week in the center of Damascus. The ceremony was attended by l…

Netherlands Approves Emojis and Emoticons for Use in Official Government Documents

THE HAGUE – The Dutch government approved legislation Wednesday allowing emojis and emoticons in official documents including passports, driving lic…

Design Clients Return to Human Designers: No Need to Explain What They Actually Want

San Francisco, CA – Design clients are returning to human designers. They say humans understand vague ideas better. Additionally, clients avoid deta…

This website publishes fictional news stories for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real events or individuals is coincidental or satirical.

en_USEN