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Zapiekanka

Poland Launches Zapiekanka Delivery to Support Troops in Preparation for Possible Conflict With Russia

WARSAW – The Ministry of National Defence has announced a new initiative to deliver zapiekanka to military personnel across the country. Deputy Prime Minister and Defense Minister Władysław Kosiniak-Kamysz confirmed that the program will begin next month. Additionally, the initiative aims to boost morale among the Polish Armed Forces during increased readiness operations.

The traditional toasted baguette with mushrooms and cheese will be supplied to bases nationwide. Furthermore, military units in eastern regions near the border will receive priority deliveries. The program includes partnerships with local food vendors throughout Poland. Thus, the Ministry expects to serve approximately 30,000 zapiekanki weekly to soldiers.

General Wiesław Kukuła, Chief of the General Staff, emphasized the importance of familiar food for troop welfare. Moreover, the delivery system will operate through established military logistics channels. Consequently, fresh zapiekanki will arrive at forward positions within hours of preparation.

The initiative complements Poland’s expanded defense budget of 186.6 billion PLN for 2025. Meanwhile, the Ministry continues to modernize equipment and increase training programs. Officials noted that proper nutrition remains essential for military readiness.

Design Clients Return to Human Designers: No Need to Explain What They Actually Want

San Francisco, CA – Design clients are returning to human designers. They say humans understand vague ideas better. Additionally, clients avoid detailed prompts with people. For example, a simple sketch works fine. However, AI tools demand exact descriptions. Now, firms like IDEO see more business. Moreover, clients save time on explanations. In fact, Adobe reports a drop in AI usage. But human teams adapt quickly. Therefore, projects finish faster overall. Meanwhile, experts at Frog Design agree. They note better results from talks.

NATO sponsorship

NATO Unveils Corporate Sponsorship Initiative, Welcoming Brands Like Rolex and Qatar Airways

Brussels, Belgium – NATO Secretary General Mark Rutte announced the new corporate sponsorship program today. The alliance now welcomes brands like Rolex and Qatar Airways as partners. This move boosts funding for defense operations. Rutte spoke at a press conference in NATO headquarters. He highlighted benefits for member nations. Rolex will sponsor precision timing in military exercises. Qatar Airways plans to support troop transport logistics. Officials expect more companies to join soon. The program follows standard alliance guidelines. Leaders from 32 member countries approved it last month. Sponsors must align with NATO values. The initiative starts in early 2026. Public reactions remain positive overall. Visit the NATO website for details. Contact sponsors like Rolex or Qatar Airways for partnership info.

Predicting Lottery Numbers

Quantum Computing Breakthrough Allows Smartphones to Predict Lottery Numbers

In a stunning development that blurs the line between science fiction and reality, a research team at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) has announced a quantum computing breakthrough. Their new algorithm allows consumer smartphones to predict lottery numbers with alleged near-perfect accuracy.

Dr. Alán Guerrero-Smith, lead researcher at the MIT Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence Laboratory, presented the findings. “We’ve effectively harnessed quantum tunneling effects on a microscopic scale within common smartphone processors,” he explained. The team calls the technology Quasi-Quantum State Forecasting (QQSF).

The implications are enormous. A beta tester reportedly used the technology on a Samsung Galaxy device to win a $1,000 prize in the recent Powerball drawing. Major tech companies are taking notice. Apple Inc. is reportedly in talks to license the software for future iOS integrations.

Netflix new feature

Netflix Announces ‘Skip Entire Show’ Button to Save Viewers Time

LOS GATOS, Calif. — Netflix has unveiled a new feature called the “Skip Show” button, allowing subscribers to bypass entire series in a single click. The streaming giant claims the tool is designed for viewers who “want the cultural benefits of binge-watching without the time commitment.”

The announcement was made on Netflix’s official newsroom (about.netflix.com) and has already sparked lively debates on social media platforms. Users say the function resembles the popular “Skip Intro” button but on an exaggerated scale.

According to Netflix product director Sarah Thompson, the feature automatically marks a show as “watched,” updates personalized recommendations, and frees up hours of screen time. “We understand people want to keep up with trends without losing sleep,” she said.

VPNhub

Pornhub Reports Majority of Profits Now Driven by VPN Services

MONTREAL, Canada – Adult entertainment giant Pornhub announced in its quarterly earnings report that VPN subscription services now account for 67% of total company profits, marking a dramatic shift from its traditional advertising-based revenue model.

The company’s “HubVPN” service generated $127 million in Q3 2025, while traditional adult content advertising contributed only $63 million during the same period.

CEO Feras Antoon described the transformation as “the most significant business pivot in our company’s history.” The shift follows nationwide age verification requirements that prompted millions of users to seek privacy solutions.

HubVPN subscriber count reached 52 million globally, making it the fastest-growing VPN service in internet history. Monthly subscription fees of $6.99 provide higher profit margins than advertising revenue ever achieved. The service operates in 97 countries with over 9,500 servers worldwide.

“We accidentally discovered our core competency,” Antoon explained during an investor call. “Privacy technology aligns perfectly with our user base’s fundamental needs.”

The company now employs more cybersecurity engineers than content moderators. Technical staff increased 400% since launching VPN services, while content acquisition budgets decreased by 60%. Industry analysts predict Pornhub will rebrand as a technology company within two years.

Wall Street responded positively to the earnings report. Pornhub’s parent company MindGeek saw stock prices surge 28% in after-hours trading. Goldman Sachs upgraded its investment rating from “hold” to “strong buy,” citing diversification benefits.

The Federal Trade Commission announced preliminary investigations into potential antitrust violations. Senator Josh Hawley called for congressional hearings on “big tech monopolization through unconventional means.”

Privacy advocates praised Pornhub’s encryption standards while questioning the company’s data collection practices. The Electronic Frontier Foundation requested transparency reports regarding user information storage and government cooperation.

Pornhub plans additional technology ventures including encrypted messaging and decentralized cloud storage. “Adult entertainment taught us about user privacy demands,” Antoon noted. “We’re simply expanding that expertise across digital services.”

ChatGPT

ChatGPT Can Now Tell You You’re Ugly, Stupid, and a Failure — VIP Subscription Required

SAN FRANCISCO — OpenAI launched Tuesday its most provocative offering yet: ChatGPT Savage, a $49 monthly subscription delivering personalized insults to users who find intense pleasure in AI-powered degradation.

The premium service taps into a surprisingly large market of consumers seeking digital humiliation for pure enjoyment. Beta testing revealed 92% user satisfaction, with subscribers describing the experience as “intoxicating” and “surprisingly addictive.”

“We discovered millions actively crave harsh AI feedback,” said OpenAI Product Manager Lisa Park. “Users beg the system to insult them harder. We’re giving people exactly what they desire.”

ChatGPT Savage analyzes photos, conversations, and personal data to craft devastating yet strangely satisfying attacks. The AI targets physical appearance, life failures, and deepest vulnerabilities to deliver what users describe as “exquisite digital pain.”

Premium features include hourly insult alerts, appearance destruction marathons, and “Total Annihilation Mode” for users seeking complete ego obliteration. Subscribers frequently request upgraded abuse packages based on emotional intensity ratings.

“I literally shiver with excitement when ChatGPT tells me I’m worthless,” wrote devoted user Jennifer Walsh. “The AI found flaws I didn’t know I had. Each insult feels like a gift.”

The service exploits emerging trends in recreational humiliation and algorithmic cruelty consumption. Users demonstrate concerning loyalty patterns, with average subscribers increasing their monthly plans within weeks.

Specialized modes include “Merciless Authority Figure,” “Sadistic Perfectionist,” and “Relentless Tormentor.” Most users select maximum intensity settings, with usage data showing alarming engagement metrics of 67 minutes daily.

“ChatGPT Savage owns me completely,” confessed regular user David Kim. “The AI destroys my confidence daily, and I absolutely love every second. I’ve upgraded to premium-plus for extra humiliation features.”

Competing platforms scramble to enter the lucrative degradation market. Meta tests Instagram “Destruction Stories,” while Google develops search results that personally attack users based on query history.

Financial projections estimate ChatGPT Savage could capture $3 billion from users willing to pay premium prices for sophisticated digital abuse. The service launches globally next month with early-bird specials for eager degradation enthusiasts.

Apple Announces iPhone 18 Will Be Fully Identical to iPhone 17

Cupertino, CA — In a bold move described by some as “philosophically minimalist,” Apple has officially announced that the upcoming iPhone 18 will be completely identical to its predecessor, the iPhone 17.

“We’ve decided not to change a single thing,” said Apple CEO Tim Cook during the keynote address. “Why improve what is already perfect? Or at least expensive?”

Analysts confirm that the iPhone 18 will feature the same dimensions, same processor, same camera, and even the same packaging—though the sticker on the box will now read “18” instead of “17.”

Customers can expect no upgrades, no surprises, and no confusion. “It’s a phone. It works. Let’s not overthink it,” Cook added, to thunderous applause from an audience largely made up of marketing executives and exhausted developers.

The only real difference? The price tag—now $50 higher, “to reflect inflation, loyalty, and the font redesign in Settings.”

Early reviews are in: “It feels exactly like my iPhone 17,” said one beta tester. “And somehow, I still want it.”

Astronomer CEO Andy Byron Launches ‘Kiss Cam Consulting’ Startup

After his viral kiss cam moment with HR chief Kristin Cabot at a Coldplay concert on July 16, 2025, former Astronomer CEO Andy Byron is turning infamy into opportunity with “Kiss Cam Consulting.” The startup coaches executives on dodging PR disasters, sparked by Byron’s jumbotron blunder in Boston, where Chris Martin quipped, “Either they’re having an affair or they’re just very shy.” Kiss Cam Consulting offers $10,000 workshops like “Jumbotron Evasion Tactics” and an AI tool, “CamGuard,” to alert clients of incoming cameras. X users are split, with @TechMemeLord calling it “peak capitalism” and others mocking the price. With $2M in seed funding, Byron aims to expand into “concert etiquette audits.” Astronomer, now led by interim CEO Pete DeJoy, declined to comment.

Following Yaccarino’s Resignation, Musk Assigns ChatGPT-4o as New X CEO

Elon Mask Sam Altman

SAN FRANCISCO — In a move that stunned even close insiders, Elon Musk has reportedly appointed OpenAI’s language model, ChatGPT-4o, as the new CEO of X (formerly Twitter), following the quiet resignation of former CEO Linda Yaccarino earlier this week.

The appointment, which has not been officially announced but was leaked by internal sources, marks the first time a generative AI has been given full executive control over a major social media platform.

“Elon didn’t want another ‘yes-man’ or ‘no-woman,’” said one anonymous X engineer. “He said GPT-4o has better logic, fewer emotions, and—his words—‘never needs a lunch break.’”

No formal response has been issued by OpenAI.

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