Putin Epstein

Russians Obtain Epstein Files; Putin Jokes About Replying to Melania’s Letter

MANHATTAN – Russian intelligence operatives obtained classified Jeffrey Epstein court documents after a federal judge accidentally left them on a Central Park bench Tuesday morning, according to FBI sources familiar with the investigation. U.S. District Judge Alison Nathan reportedly forgot the sealed files during her routine jog through the park. A jogger discovered the manila…

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VPNhub

Pornhub Reports Majority of Profits Now Driven by VPN Services

MONTREAL, Canada – Adult entertainment giant Pornhub announced in its quarterly earnings report that VPN subscription services now account for 67% of total company profits, marking a dramatic shift from its traditional advertising-based revenue model. The company’s “HubVPN” service generated $127 million in Q3 2025, while traditional adult content advertising contributed only $63 million during…

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Himba Pride

After Recognizing Palestine, Australia Formally Declares Himba Tribe a Sovereign State

CANBERRA – Days after officially recognizing the State of Palestine, the Australian government has surprised the international community by granting sovereign state status to the Himba people of northern Namibia. Foreign Minister Penny Wong announced the decision during a press briefing at Parliament House, calling it “a bold step in cultural diplomacy.” According to Wong,…

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Alaska For Russia

Make Alaska Russian Again’: Demonstrators Rally in Anchorage for Return to Moscow Rule

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Approximately 200 demonstrators gathered outside the Alaska State Capitol on Saturday, waving Russian flags and demanding the immediate “return” of Alaska to Moscow’s control. The rally marks a dramatic shift for Alaska’s independence movement, which traditionally sought complete sovereignty rather than reunification with Russia. “We’ve been American for 157 years, and look…

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ChatGPT

ChatGPT Can Now Tell You You’re Ugly, Stupid, and a Failure — VIP Subscription Required

SAN FRANCISCO — OpenAI launched Tuesday its most provocative offering yet: ChatGPT Savage, a $49 monthly subscription delivering personalized insults to users who find intense pleasure in AI-powered degradation. The premium service taps into a surprisingly large market of consumers seeking digital humiliation for pure enjoyment. Beta testing revealed 92% user satisfaction, with subscribers describing…

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Learning Golf

U.S. Schools to Require Golf Lessons for All Students Starting 2026

President Donald Trump has unveiled a nationwide policy that will require all public school students to learn golf starting in the 2026 academic year. Trump described the initiative as “the biggest upgrade to American education since the invention of recess.” According to the White House press release, the plan will replace traditional physical education classes…

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Low cost airlines

Low-cost Airlines Now Weigh Travelers Together With Luggage to Ensure “Fair Fares”

Several budget airlines have announced a controversial new policy: passengers and their luggage will now be weighed together before boarding. The measure, according to International Budget Airlines Association representatives, aims to create “a more efficient and fair ticket pricing model.” Under the new system, travelers will step onto industrial-size scales with their carry-ons and checked…

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Truth Social

U.S. Announces 2028 Presidential Election to Be Hosted Exclusively on Truth Social

The Federal Election Commission announced today that the 2028 U.S. presidential election will take place entirely within the Truth Social app. Officials describe the move as a “modern leap into digital democracy.” Critics call it “a recipe for chaos” (Washington Post report). Voters will cast ballots by liking their preferred candidate’s latest post. Political debates…

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